I didn’t intend to blog every day throughout potty training. Yesterday was just so overwhelming that I found myself needing the outlet, and today was just as bad, so I find myself here again.
I’m reading a mommy devotional right now called The Busy Mom’s Book of Inspiration: Devotions to Renew Your Spirit. Last night’s was on temper, which was ironic because mine had been out of control all day. Potty training is the ultimate test of one’s patience; it will push every button you have and leave you crying at the end of the day (or sometimes in the middle of the day, as was my case today). I found myself blowing up left and right yesterday, despite my efforts to control myself. But in my devotional, it made the point that I’m not teaching my kids how to deal with their own frustrations if I lose it over every little thing. In those moments where I’m losing my temper over a small frustration, I’m really no better than my 3 year old pitching a fit over fill-in-the-blank-insignificant-in-the-grand-scheme-thing. How can I expect them to learn patience if I don’t exhibit it myself?
So I prayed the prayer at the end of my devotional with all honesty and sincerity: “Lord, here is this anger. In the name of Jesus Christ, I surrender it to your authority. By Your grace, I will not take it back.” – Elizabeth Elliott
I prayed it over and over again until I fell asleep.
Today has been very challenging. There were countless accidents; I spent most of the day on my knees cleaning up pee. (Which happens to be a pretty good work out by the way) I literally did the dishes all day because I kept getting interrupted by trips to the potty or more accidents. And I wasn’t even able to get through all of them! I still have a sink, counter, and stove top full of things to wash.
There was one point where Ary had 2 accidents within the span of 5 minutes, and both of them where rather large puddles. As I ran over to clean up the second one, I caught sight of another pee puddle on the living room carpet. But this one wasn’t from Ary; this was one of the dogs. In the commotion of potty training, I forgot to let the dogs out. Even though I knew it was my fault, I completely lost it. Granted, I don’t know if many people wouldn’t have lost their minds in that moment. But nonetheless I am ashamed to have acted the way that I did in front of the kids. Then as I was heading over to Ary’s pee puddle with my bucket of cleaner and rag, I hear a knock on the door. I open it to find a Schwan’s salesman on my porch. He barely got to introduce himself before I said, “No, thank you”. He seemed taken aback. Sorry Schwan’s guy, but that was the absolute extent of pleasantries I could summon at that moment in time.
I finally got to sit down and eat lunch after I put the girls down for a nap. Tyler was sweet enough to get me a combo from Wendy’s on his way back from an errand. I had just enough time to get through it when I hear Eowyn yelling for me upstairs. My body already hurt at this point from running Ary back and forth to the potty (apparently running while holding a 20 pound child for 4 hours is good exercise too), but I find some energy to drag myself upstairs. I open their bedroom door to find Ary standing in Eowyn’s bed with her diaper thrown on the floor. Oh, and her diaper was full of poop. And her blanket and the blanket that I had put next to her bed should she fall out and a bit of the carpet and her hands also had poop on them. I clean up the all of the poop, duct tape her next diaper on her, put her back in her own bed, and run the poop laundry downstairs to the washer, which was currently doing a load of pee towels.
I then spent the next hour and 45 minutes policing nap time. For every 2-5 minutes, I had to go in there and put Ary back in her bed. Eowyn had to go potty twice, but the second time was just a ploy to get out of bed. At the end of it, every single inch of me ached. I finally gave up around the time that Eowyn was yelling, “Mom, I need to fart!” Because, you need to get out of bed to fart obviously.
The following hour ended in me locking myself in the bathroom, sobbing. I couldn’t bring myself to clean up any more pee after that, so I threw a diaper on Ary and made dinner. She stayed in a diaper for the remainder of the evening. I got in a good 5 hours of hard core potty training though, and that’s gonna have to be good enough.
She had about 15 accidents today. But, there were 4 shinning moments where she came up to me and said, “Potty, now!” And when I put her on the toilet those 4 times, she peed (and even pooped one time) in the potty. So even though today was draining in every meaning of the word, it was actually a very successful potty training day. It took Eowyn weeks before she could tell me that she needed to go before she was peeing all over the floor. Yet on the second day, Ary did it 4 times! She’s getting it. I just have to hang in there and focus on the positives.
I also caught both of them potty training their babies, which melted my heart.
And the fairies left more baby birds in our fairy garden for us to watch over : )
After the girls went to bed for the night, I soaked in our tub with the jets on and got through half a chapter of Game of Thrones before I heard Ary crying for me. I found her in the hallway, sandwiched between our rooms. When I asked her why she was out of bed, she said, “E-cause, e-cause, I potty!” (translation: “Because, because, I went potty!”) She also said something about the floor and her bed, so I’m thinking she fell out of bed and either peed right there or realized that she was already wet. Either way, it’s a great sign that she’s really getting it, because even when she’s sleepy and out of it, she’s recognizing the sensation. I changed her diaper, cuddled her for a few minutes, and tucked her back into her bed with Eskimo kisses. I needed that sweet moment with her after the long day that we had.
Lord, here is this anger. In the name of Jesus Christ, I surrender it to your authority. By Your grace, I will not take it back.